Explaining Violence to Children

The Rice Lake Public Library sends our sincere condolences to the people and families affected by the violence at the Sandy Hook Elementary school in Newtown, Connecticut. Even though we are so far away geographically from Connecticut, this terrible tragedy affects us all.

Here are some tips on how to cope:

1. Be aware of your feelings and thoughts. Anxiety, worry, sadness and anger are all expected reactions to violent events such as school shootings. It is important, however, that you understand your feelings and thoughts.
2. Do not make assumptions. Each individual has different reactions and responses to a traumatic event. It is important that you do not make assumptions about other’s thoughts and feelings.
3. Engage in open communication.
4. Expect emotions. Expect that everyone will be experiencing a number of emotions and that feelings will fluctuate from day to day.
5. Validate emotions. A great variety of feelings can be expected as a result of school violence. For example, you can say “I can see that you are very worried about going back to school”, “I know how confused you are about all this. I feel the same way” or “I can see that you are very sad.”
6. Be honest and open. Sharing your own feelings may help to normalize the experiences and reactions of others.
7. Keep it in perspective. 
8. Discuss the signs of violence. Have conversations with others about signs of violence in your surroundings. Keep in mind that although warning signs may exist, not everyone with warning signs will engage in aggressive or violent behaviors. Some of the signs include a history of threatening behaviors, violence or aggression, difficulty controlling anger and frustration, and regular run-ins with the law. Other warning signs include significant withdrawal from social activities and friends, a history of rejection or victimization through bullying, and a sense of loneliness and alienation. However, be sure to communicate that not everyone they encounter with these signs is potentially a danger to them.
9. Be proactive. Research the safety procedures and plans at your child’s school with your children. Read information on the school’s website or handbook and ask questions of the administration.
10. Continue with your goals and plans.
11. Use and model coping skills. Use relaxation techniques that have worked for you in the past. Relaxation techniques include taking slow, deep breaths from the diaphragm and visualizing a safe and calm place, such as a sandy beach or pleasurable memory.
12. Give back to your community with volunteering. 
13. Seek professional guidance.
14. Seek social support. 

Some of you may be wondering how to discuss this violence with children. The National Association of School Psychologists offer a series of suggestions for doing so. Click here for this handout. Here are some important points to emphasize:

• Schools are safe places. School staff work with parents and public safety providers (local police and fire departments, emergency responders, hospitals, etc.) to keep you safe.
• The school building is safe because … (cite specific school procedures).
• We all play a role in the school safety. Be observant and let an adult know if you see or hear something that makes you feel uncomfortable, nervous or frightened.
• There is a difference between reporting, tattling or gossiping. You can provide important information that may prevent harm either directly or anonymously by telling a trusted adult what you know or hear.
• Don’t dwell on the worst possibilities. Although there is no absolute guarantee that something bad will never happen, it is important to understand the difference between the possibility of something happening and the probability that it will affect our school.
• Senseless violence is hard for everyone to understand. Doing things that you enjoy, sticking to your normal routine, and being with friends and family help make us feel better and keep us from worrying about the event.
• Sometimes people do bad things that hurt others. They may be unable to handle their anger, under the influence of drugs or alcohol, or suffering from mental illness. Adults
• (parents, teachers, police officers, doctors, faith leaders) work very hard to get those people help and keep them from hurting others. It is important for all of us to know how to get help if we feel really upset or angry and to stay away from drugs and alcohol.
• Stay away from guns and other weapons. Tell an adult if you know someone has a gun. Access to guns is one of the leading risk factors for deadly violence.
• Violence is never a solution to personal problems. Students can be part of the positive solution by participating in anti-violence programs at school, learning conflict mediation skills, and seeking help from an adult if they or a peer is struggling with anger, depression, or other emotions they cannot control.

Tips and topics provided by the National Association of School Psychologists.

Holidays in December

Happy Hanukkah! Merry Christmas! Happy Kwanzaa! These are three major holidays in December. The library has something to offer you regardless of which event you celebrate.

Hanukkah is the first holiday celebrated in December. It is held from December 8 – 16, this year. This holiday celebrates the victory of the Jews over the Greek Syrians in 165 BC. According to Jewish tradition, the triumphant Jews entered the Holy Temple in Jerusalem and dedicated it to the service of their God. But when they entered the temple, they found only enough lamp oil to last one night, but the oil somehow managed to burn for the whole eight days it took to go in search for more oil.

Christmas is the next holiday celebrated in December. It is held on December 25. This Christian holiday celebrates the birth of Jesus Christ.

Kwanzaa is the final holiday celebrated in December. It is celebrated on December 26. Kwanzaa, which means “first fruit of the harvest” in Swahili, is a time to focus on the traditional African values of family. It is based upon the celebration of seven principles or beliefs called the Nguzo Saba and was created by Ron Karenga in 1966 to celebrate African-American heritage.

Happy holidays, everyone! We wish you the best. Everyone is always welcome at the Rice Lake Public Library.

Month of Thankfulness

Have you heard about a popular trend going on in Facebook? Many people are choosing to list one thing each day for which they are grateful. It makes sense. Thanksgiving Day is in November.

Thanks is “an acknowledgment of appreciation.” It can be for an action, a person, a thing, or an idea. The following books are about gratitude and giving thanks. They are available at the library or through the MORE system.

365 Thank Yous : The Year a Simple Act of Daily Gratitude Changed My Life
by John Kralik
Just when his dearest life dreams seemed to have slipped beyond his reach, Kralik was struck by the belief that his life might become at least tolerable if, instead of focusing on what he didn’t have, he could find some way to be grateful for what he had. He set the goal of writing 365 thank-you notes in the coming year.

Living Life as a Thank You
by Nina Lesowitz and Mary Beth Sammons
Whatever is given — even a difficult and challenging moment — is a gift. Living as if each day is a thank-you can help transform fear into courage, anger into forgiveness, isolation into belonging, and another’s pain into healing. Saying thank-you every day inspires feelings of love, compassion, and hope. These ideas are the basis for this timely book. Each chapter includes stories of individuals whose lives have been transformed by embracing this program, along with motivating quotes and blessings, and a suggested gratitude practice such as keeping a weekly gratitude journal and starting a gratitude circle.

Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude can Make You Happier
by Robert Emmons
Did you know that there is a crucial component of happiness that is often overlooked? Scientifically speaking, regular grateful thinking can increase happiness by as much as 25 percent, while keeping a gratitude journal for as little as three weeks results in better sleep and more energy. But there’s more than science to embrace here: Emmons also bolsters the case for gratitude by weaving in writings of philosophers, novelists, and theologians that illustrate all the benefits grateful living brings.

Crafts for the Season

Halloween is one of the most decorated and celebrated holidays.  It’s an event that gives a good bang for a buck. Individual purchases are usually small ticket items, and almost all of it is for the purchaser. According to the National Retail Federation, spending for Halloween decor is second only to that of Christmas.

The library can help make celebrating the season even more low cost and enjoyable. Have you considered making holiday decorations yourself? Here some great books at our library all about how to do it:

Or maybe you are at home and just want to find some Halloween how-to’s online. Click on the picture below for a great round up of online Halloween ideas.

The picture above links to a blog called SlapDashMom. The blog features a long list of crafts and activities with links to the instructions for each one.

Top Books to Film

August 9th is Book Lover’s Day and here are some books to film movies.

Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring/ The Two Towers/The Return of the King (2001,2002, 2003) Rated PG-13

In ancient times the Rings of Power were crafted by the Elven-smiths, and Sauron, the Dark Lord, forged the One Ring, filling it with his own power so that he could rule all others. But the One Ring was taken from him, and though he sought it throughout Middle-Earth still it remained lost to him. After many ages it fell, by chance, into the hands of the Hobbit, Bilbo Baggins. On his eleventy-first birthday, Bilbo disappeared, bequeathing to his young cousin, Frodo, the Ruling Ring, and a perilous quest: to journey across Middle-Earth, deep into the shadow of the Dark Lord and destroy the Ring by casting it into the Cracks of Doom. Based on the book: Lord of the Rings: Fellowship of the Ring 

Join Frodo, Gandalf, Aragorn, and brave members of the Fellowship as they continue their quest to destroy the Ring of Power. As darkness descends on Middle-earth, a strange creature named Gollum leads the heroes to the Black Gates of Mordor. The rest of Middle-earth prepares for a battle that will decide the fate of all. Based on the book : The Two Towers

Frodo makes his way through the darkness to Mount Doom to destroy the One Ring. Aragon learns of his destiny as the true King and the others prepare for a massive battle that will determine the fate of Middle-Earth. Based on the Book: Return of the King

The Godfather (1972) Rated R

Focuses on the Corleone family’s rise and near fall from power, shifting between the Sicilian Americans’ family life and their criminal enterprises. Based on the book: The Godfather

Schindler’s List (1993) Rated R

The story of a Catholic war profiteer, Oskar Schindler, who risked his life and went bankrupt in order to save more than 1,000 Jews from certain death in concentration camps. He employed Jews in his crockery factory manufacturing goods for the German army. At the same time he tries to stay solvent with the help of a Jewish accountant and negotiates business with a vicious Nazi commandant who enjoys shooting Jews as target practice from the balcony of his villa that overlooks the prison camp he commands. Based on the Book: Schindler’s list 

Hunt for Red October (1990) Rated PG

A new Soviet sub, the Red October, is heading for the U.S. coast. Government experts think it is planning to attack–that is, all the experts but one. He thinks the sub’s commander is planning to defect, but he has only a few hours to find the sub and prove his theory. Based on the book:  Hunt for Red October

Doctor Zhivago (1965) Rated PG-13

A poet and surgeon, husband and lover, finds his life disrupted by war. It alters the lives of many, including Tonya, the gentle woman he marries and Lara, the woman he cannot forget. Based on the book: Doctor Zhivago

Summer Olympics in Film

 

Chariots of Fire (1981) Rated PG

Story of two British runners that were both driven by different means to win at the 1924 Paris Olympics. One used his faith in God, and the other his hatred of Anti-Semitism. Based on a true story.

Munich (2005) Rated R

The story of the secret Israeli squad assigned to track down and assassinate the Palestinian terrorists believed to have planned the 1972 Munich massacre of eleven Israeli athletes–and the personal toll this mission of revenge takes on the team and the man who leads it.

Walk Don’t Run (1966) Rated NR

When English industrialist Sir William Rutland arrives in Tokyo on business, the influx of tourists for the upcoming Olympic games makes it impossible to find lodging, so Sir William fast-talks his way into sharing an apartment with beautiful Christine Easton for a few days. To further confuse matters, Sir William invites Olympic athlete Steve Davis to share his half of the apartment. Sir William then plays Cupid between Christine and Steve, much to Christine’s stodgy fiancé’s surprise. Will Sir William manage to send his roomies to the altar?

One Day in September (1999) Rated NR

They were billed as the ‘Olympics of Peace and Joy’ but became the Olympics of terror — Munich 1972. An extreme Palestinian group called Black September held 11 Israeli athletes hostage in the Olympic village while the world looked on, incredulous. Using extraordinary archive footage, music and interviews with those who took part (including the only surviving member of the Black September group), “One day in September” tells the dramatic story of what happened in Munich during those 21 hours.

Without Limits (1998) Rated PG-13

A fictionalized account of Steve Prefontaine, a distance runner, who took the sport into a new era.

Celebrate Independence Day

Happy Fourth of July!  Independence Day commemorates the adoption of the Declaration of Independence on July 4, 1776. It has been celebrated since 1777, and was officially made a paid federal holiday in 1938.

This holiday is celebrated by setting off fireworks, bonfires, and other patriotic displays, as well as gathering for parties, barbecues, and baseball games. It is also placed perfectly in the summer time, which allows most of us to enjoy warm weather and the outdoors. What about you? How are you planning to celebrate the Fourth of July?

Celebrate with Books & Movies!

All the President’s Men (1976 ) – DVD
Dramatization of the early days of the Watergate investigation, as two young reporters for the Washington Post begin to realize its implications while pursuing the story.

Independence Day (1996) – DVD
Massive spaceships appear in Earth’s skies and wonder turns to terror as the ships blast destructive beams of fire down on cities all over the planet. The world’s only hope lies with a determined band of survivors.

Independence Day
by Richard Ford
Frank Bascombe, in the aftermath of his divorce and the ruin of his career, has entered an “Existence Period,” selling real estate in Haddam, New Jersey, and mastering the high-wire act of normalcy. But over one Fourth of July weekend, Frank is called into sudden, bewildering engagement with life. Independence Day is a moving, peerlessly funny odyssey through America and through the layered consciousness of one of its most compelling literary incarnations, conducted by a novelist of astonishing empathy and perception.

Liberty : a Lake Wobegon Novel
by Garrison Keillor
A national holiday in Lake Wobegon is always gaudy and joyful. But when the major planner behind the Fourth of July parade and the twenty-four-year-old girl who dresses up as the Statue of Liberty develop a close “friendship,” rumors begin to fly. What will happen is anybody’s guess as CNN and the governor put in an appearance in Lake Wobegon–home to a good loving people who drive each other crazy.

The Music Man (1962) – DVD
“Professor” Harold Hill is a con man who comes to River City, IA, in the weeks just prior to the 1912 Fourth of July celebration. Persuading the town that the youth of River City is in great danger of being corrupted, Hill convinces them that they need to organization a boy’s band, with himself as a leader. Hill promises to teach the kids how to make music by utilizing his revolutionary “Think System.” There’s only one problem: the professor doesn’t know one note from another.

Sisters
by Danielle Steel
On one Fourth of July weekend, as they do every year, the four sisters come home to Connecticut for their family’s annual gathering. But before the holiday is over, tragedy strikes and their world is utterly changed. Suddenly, four sisters who have been fervently pursuing success and their own lives on opposite sides of the world reunite to share one New York brownstone, to support each other and their father, and to pick up the pieces while one sister struggles to heal her shattered body and soul.

Independence Day Films 2012

The Patriot (2000) Rated R

A hero of the French and Indian conflict, Benjamin Martin had renounced fighting forever to raise his family in peace. However, when British troops arrive at his South Carolina home and endanger his family, he takes up arms alongside his idealistic patriot son, Gabriel.

Johnny Tremain (1957) Rated NR

Johnny Tremain, a silversmith’s apprentice, dreams of learning the trade and making his own way. When a terrible injury ends his hopes, he joins the emerging Sons of Liberty and takes part in the Boston Tea Party and the Battle of Lexington Green.

1776 (1972) Rated PG

1776 is a delightful musical celebration of the founding of The United States of America. The story centers around the familiar historical characters as they organize a movement for independence from Mother England. All events lead up to that most significant date, July 4, 1776, when the Declaration of Independence was signed.

National Treasure (2004) Rated PG

Since his childhood, Benjamin Franklin Gates has known that he is a descendant of a long line of people whose job it has been to guard a treasure hidden by the Founding Fathers. They hid clues to its whereabouts in the country’s currency and on the back of the Declaration of Independence. Now, Ben has learned of a plot to steal the Declaration, and has only one option: he has to steal it himself. Even if he pulls off this monumental task, keeping the treasure safe is still going to be incredibly hard, especially since the FBI now knows of his plans.

Drums Along the Mohawk (1939) Rated NR

A historical drama that tells the story of a young frontier leader, his spirited wife, and their struggles in the backwoods of New York state.

Teen Books that Adults Should Read

Teen books aren’t just for teens. They are well written, engaging books that are grabbing the attention of all ages – maybe because a younger family member introduces the book, or because the story is being made into a movie, or perhaps because it has won an award. Whatever the reason, here are some fantastic teen books that we think you should read.

A teen book is any book or story that has primary appeal to teenagers. This usually translates into young protagonists exploring their place in the world. Sometimes this coming of age is completed in a contemporary, realistic setting, but more often than not lately, these big questions are answered through tableaus of mortal danger and dystopian settings.

The following list is not comprehensive. It’s not a list of award winners. It’s not a list of the best sellers. It’s not a list of the newest, hottest, most daring or whatever “-est” adjective you can think of. It is a list of titles found on YA Lit bloggers’ websites that I thought sounded like they might appeal to adult readers interested in YA Lit. Hopefully some of these titles will appeal to you.

The Chocolate War (1974)
by Robert Cormier
Jerry Renault is forced into a psychological showdown with Trinity School’s gang leader, Archie Costello, for refusing to be bullied into selling chocolates for the annual fund raising.

The Mockingbirds (2010)
by Daisy Whitney
When Alex, a junior at an elite preparatory school, realizes that she may have been the victim of date rape, she confides in her roommates and sister who convince her to seek help from a secret society, the Mockingbirds.

My Beating Teenage Heart (2011)
by C.K. Kelly Martin
Two unexpected and heartbreaking deaths cause the lives of two very different teenagers to become intertwined as one struggles to deal with his grief and stay in this world, and the other finds herself inexplicably caught between this world and the next.

Once Was Lost (2009)
by Sara Zarr
As the tragedy of a missing girl enfolds in her small town, fifteen-year-old Samara, who feels emotionally abandoned by her parents, begins to question her faith.

Rats Saw God (1996)
by Rob Thomas
In hopes of graduating, Steve York agrees to complete a hundred-page writing assignment which helps him to sort out his relationship with his famous astronaut father and the events that changed him from promising student to troubled teen.

The Space Between Trees (2010)
by Katie Williams
When the body of a classmate is discovered in the woods, sixteen-year-old Evie’s lies wind up involving her with the girl’s best friend, trying to track down the killer.

The True Meaning of Smekday (2007)
by Adam Rex
When her mother is abducted by aliens on Christmas Eve (or “Smekday” Eve since the Boov invasion), 11 year-old Tip hops in the family car and heads south to find her and meets an alien Boov mechanic who agrees to help her, and save the planet from disaster.

Father’s Day Films 2012

To Kill a Mockingbird (1962) Rated NR

A Southern lawyer defends a black man accused of rape. The story is viewed through the eyes of his young daughter, Scout.

Finding Nemo (2003) Rated G

The fretful Malin and his young son Nemo, become separated from each other in the Great Barrier Reef. Nemo, a clown fish, is unexpectedly taken from his home and thrust into a fish tank in a dentist’s office overlooking Sydney Harbor. Buoyed by the companionship of a friendly fish named Dory, Malin embarks on a dangerous trek and finds himself the unlikely hero.

Father of the Bride (1950) & (1991) Rated NR & PG

A father deals with his only daughter’s lavish wedding.

Kramer vs. Kramer (1979) Rated PG

When his wife walks out, Ted Kramer and his six-year-old son have a chance to really get to know each other. Then Ted’s wife returns and she wants her son back.

Parenthood (1989) Rated PG-13

The Buckmans are a modern family facing the age-old dilemma of trying to raise children the “right” way.